Disgust

Recently I read  the angry words of a father.  They were threatening and unwarranted and they made me shiver in disgust.

The father was writing in regards to money and business and the son had to bear the thoughtlessness of his own father’s words.

I thought of my own father.  What he wouldn’t give to have his son back. He would lay down his life to know the boy he knew before the needle had taken over his life.

I read the evil words the father had written and I wished he knew the pain he was ultimately causing his son, pain that could never be reversed but could have been withheld.

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2 thoughts on “Disgust”

  1. happy birthday to me and my brother.
    today is my 18th birthday party and all this week my brother was high on a combo of God knows what. He’s turning 30 tomorrow. now every time my birthday comes around i will always remember this year, this horrifying year. i could write a book with the things he was pulling.

    at one time my mom was blessing the house praying that this would make a difference. he was gurgling sitting slumped in the den couch asleep (high of course) and my mom put holy water on his head and she heard a growl. she proceeded around the room thinking it was just the dogs out side. after making her round about the house her gut tells her to go back to him. she puts more holy water on him and he lets out these pig evil animalistic growls and grunts,

    i’m in the next room studying and my mom starts screaming the our father. immediately i start crying in anger that my brother is this fucked up to scare my mom so bad she might have a heart attack. she said his face turned white and his head movements reminded her of the exorcist. i came into the room and he was hugging her slurring his laugh im just kidding. i called him a bitch and my mom was so traumatized she slept in my room with me.

    shit he made me want to beat his ass. i thought maybe if i fuck him up he will open his eyes… i didn’t. he says the craziest shit. i don’t know what to do. and its helpful to know others are going through the same thing.

    God bless you all
    sarah

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  2. Sarah

    I’m sorry your family is going through this. Sounds like your brother is in need of some serious help. I hope he finds the help he needs. It may also help if you and your mom talk to someone too. Family NA meetings are a big help.

    xo

    Like

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